Zero Punctuation: Turok

Zero Punctuation's latest review: Turok.

[Brian5247]

"Ride a winged marshmallow to the sherbert kingdom."

[Brian5247]

Lighten up you whores.

[iAmPS3]

I thought was pretty funny =D

[DiabloRising]

I have to agree with the guy on the whole marching behind Halo bit. Sure, Halo was great for its time... but now everything looks the same.

[VirusE]

The halo health system works for halos mechanics and even makes sense since it is explain by the fact you have a shield and once said shield is gone you can die with one bullet to the head. There are even weapons for getting rid of your shield. Halo is in my opinion the only game to get that system right.

Notice every game he list as a game he likes is a pc game. Also notice his comments about controlling fps games with a controller... He obviously is a pc fanboy who is EXTREMELY inept at using a console controller. I hated turok too but i didn’t seem to have any issues shooting things. Heck he seems to suck at games. He couldn’t even get out of the first area in the darkness for godsake?!?!?

I like his reviews but the more i see them the more i realize that he has zero business reviewing console games. After the whole drakes fortune and halo 3 reviews i started to see it. He made multiple comments about how things in halo had been done before in other games yet he seemed to miss the point that those other games copied those systems from halo 1 not vice versa. It’s like saying halflife ep 2 isnt original because it uses physics based puzzles like so many other games do. Considering HL2 was one of the first games to use physics puzzles and they are a huge part of the game it would be silly to fault it for that just like it was silly to knock halo for its use of mechanics that it created but are now copied by to many other games. When halo 1 came it nothing else played anything like it and it is one of the most copied games ever made.

Ohh yeah and he gets less funny with every review. He is extremely racist too. He sees EVERYTHING as racism as most racist do. I smell a fad.

[BlackCountryBob]

Exhumed was the first FPS I ever played and it is still one of my favourites, in spite of its "claw your own eyes out for some relief" insane difficulty level.

Good review this week after the (IMO) not so accurate reviews of Uncharted and Burnout in the past couple of weeks.

[Spinner]

Can anyone explain to me why this guy uses 360 boxart in his videos for great titles like Call of Duty 4, Burnout, and so on ... and PS3 boxart for crappy games like Turok, etc? (For multiplat games)

[resistance100]

I imagin it just depends what version of the game the site who provides the games he reviews gives him.

[jmare]

That's possible, but it's also possible that there is some bias. Really though, it seems kind of trivial.

[BloodySinner]

Can anyone explain to me how a user who goes by "3FIXME" (reference to the Xbox 360's red ring of death) with a picture of 58x62 pixeled PlayStation 3 console on top of the Xbox 360 as an avatar would notice a small detail like this?

[ianp622]

I imagine if Yahtzee had any bias against PS3, he would make it much more obvious (and probably funnier) than using different video game cases.

His review is similar to the many other reviews of this game, but I'm wondering why he chose to review a game that is obviously a rather generic FPS (based on other reviews, that is. I haven't played it myself.)

[Squeezle]

If you watch his console rundown, it's both hilarious and accurate (for a few months ago) and he doesn't show much bias for any particular system. As for this most recent review, it wasn't nearly as funny as some of his other ones. Also, I get the impression that he's not very good at FPS games (at least on console. He seems to be (and indeed even states so) a PC gamer at heart. Funny guy, accurate reviews (for the most part), but take them with a pinch of salt for his preferred gaming style.

[Adamalicious]

In generally I think I actually prefer the COD health method (I'm not sure who did it first) to the straight up health meter - I find it keeps me in the game more while making it simultaneously less frustrating. Perhaps the Resistance-style partially-regenerating meter is a happy medium.

[desolationstorm]

Its a two way street in my opinion. Health meters are good sometimes, but whats the difference in an online fight if you shoot someone and they get away and their health recharges or they run off and get a medkit?

The main part I like about the recharge health is that it keeps the rainbow real health while still giving you a chance if you get hit. Come on health bars just got annoying. Nothing I hate more then a fps where we could just sit there unload a clip into each other then reload and while unloading the second clip one of us dies. This isnt a hollywood movie were actually hitting each other with most of the shots.

Guess thats just me, because the only I used to play goldeneye is one hit kill pistols. Anything else just seemed retarded.

[VirusE]

Regen health systems for fps games was created by halo for the record.

[Bazookajoe_83]

And this one was also true =)

[Snarko]

More words of wisdom from our favorite reviewer. Console eff pee ess' are stuck in haloism. And its boring..

[sa_nick]

Is that little goblin dude drinking Tooheys Extra Dry Platinum?

[GETPWNT]

Shooters with sh1t analogue stick programming shouldn't even be passed by the ESRB. Should be rated S for Sh1t. Why the hell can't these moronic devs figure-out how to program a friggin stick like Infinity Ward? Is it really that hard? Jesus. Hell, Not even Bungie could do it. Pathetic. I mean, they're good, but compared to COD4, Halo has sh1t for aiming controls, just like most console FPS's. This is one of the biggest reasons COD4 holds the console FPS crown.

[heyheyhey]

wasn't as funny as usual

but still pretty effing hilarious

[Chubear]

and now I exit.

[ElfShotTheFood]

"Regen health systems for fps games was created by halo for the record."

You obviously never played Trespasser.

[MK_Red]

Super awesome as always. Plus, he mentions the uber awesome Blood! Superb FPS.